Finding Treasures
This summer I’ve been on a mission. It began at my mother’s home, a house that has been unoccupied for twenty-five years. I’m finding treasures, trash, and lots of memories.
The treasures aren’t of monetary value–no hoards of gold or cash, but the memories are precious:
- Pictures of my mother in college in 1941
- My high school report cards with teacher comments
- Sentimental items relevant to my siblings
- Some of my early writing efforts (treasures probably only to my mother)
- Newspaper articles focused on family members from decades past
- Pictures, pictures, pictures
- Books and more books–multiple genres
Memories of poverty
My grandparents and parents lived through the Great Depression. They remembered poverty.
My parents experienced a significant recession in the 1950s. Those years of doing without profoundly affected them.
The motto of their generations seemed to be–don’t throw it away–we might need it later.
So . . . in the non-treasure category, I found old appliances, broken furniture, ancient trunks packed with unrecognizable items, stores of cloth and buttons, an infinite number of old magazines, stacks of musty and smelly newspapers, boxes of vinyl albums, mismatched and broken dishes, and a plethora of objects I can’t identify.
I can’t fault my ancestors for saving “things.” I’ve realized I inherited the gene. I’m not only sentimental (saving memories), I also keep objects that approach the end of their usefulness but I don’t toss them out (because I might need it later).
Lesson learned (I hope)
However, spending weeks looking through the multitude of items in the house I was raised have convinced me of something:
When I’m gone, I don’t want my children to face such an enormity of memories (a house full of clutter). Since the project began at my mother’s, I’ve also initiated a basement cleanout at my own house and clutter reduction of years of memories.
The treasures I’m finding are precious memories and grant me a closer connection to my parents and grandparents, now gone. My grandmother was the daughter of a Primitive Baptist minister and a devout follower of Jesus. She, her mother, and daughter (my mother) were all teachers–life-long learners–avid readers, and I followed in their footsteps.
Treasures in Heaven
Jesus said:
“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” (Matthew 6:19-21)
By no means am I suggesting that my parents and grandparents, by living a frugal lifestyle and being sentimental with keepsakes, were attempting to store up treasures on earth. Their heart was with their Lord and Savior as they attempted to survive through tough times, love their families, and serve their community.
That’s part of of the lesson I’ve learned from studying their lives through documents, books, pictures, and “things.” The other goal placed on my heart is not to leave a mountain of artifacts for my family, but just enough memories to let them know my great love for them. And of greatest importance, I want to share the example to love our Savior with our whole heart.
“‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ (Matthew 22:37-39).
Have you experienced the overwhelming task of filtering through a loved ones paperwork and memories? How can we honor the legacy and precious memories of those gone before? What strategies can we implement to avoid building earthly treasures?
Thank you for being wonderful role models to guide our children.
I wonder? For the past few months, actually years I have been doing the same thing. It has been a slow process, that has speeded up in the past few weeks. Like you, I don’t want my children to have to go through our things, trying to figure out what’s important, what’s not what was important to us. What’s not. Especially since what first started this was my first husband passing away and I still haven’t gotten through his things.. but as you say…you come across things that you have forgotten that bring back such lovely memories. Thank you for your post.
Thank you, dear friend–for your encouragement and understanding. Wishing you blessings, perseverance, and joy as you go through this same process–and may lots of precious memories unfold.
Katherine this sounds so much like my experiences of sorting, remembering, and preserving. I opted for three-ring binders and recorded family history and selected photos in albums. Shifting to the present I have a quilt made from Christmas pajamas through the years. I passed Bibles on to grandsons.
I have read/learned that it’s important in the grieving process to leave items for family to go through rather than have the house tidy- survivors need that to remember.
I’m so glad you shared your thoughts, Marilyn. I love the family pajama quilt–what a wonderful idea! Like you, I do binders and photo albums, and scrapbooks. I do plan to leave some memorabilia for my children (probably more than they want). I’m still sentimental in that I’ve kept things for each of them over the years. I wouldn’t change the fact that I’ve had the opportunity to sort through my parents’ (and grandparents) lives and memories, but it’s taken me months of consistent labor to do the task. I want to spare them a little of that, but as you point out, it’s good for us to review memories as part of the grieving process. I know it’s been good for me. Thanks for blessing me with your message.
I can really relate to this at this point in my life. After my in laws passed, there was an overwhelming amount of stuff to sort through. I too came to realize I didn’t want my children to have to do that when I’m gone. Now that my dad has passed, my mother is faced with thinking about what will be left for me and my brother when she’s gone. As you stated so well, it’s much more than considering what to do with stuff. It’s an emotional journey that takes time.
I feel for you Terri. Marilyn’s reply brought out a very important point. Going through articles, documents, pictures, and lots of other memories was healing for me, even though both of my parents passed away many years ago. But the memories remain, mostly good, and the bad ones have faded with time. I’m saving some things for my children, but I don’t want them faced with the enormity of the task I’ve experienced. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Peace and blessings!
Yes, my husband and I have sorted through our parents papers, belongings, clothing, etc. Each time we opened a box or bin, we learned something new about our parents. Some finds brought joy. Other finds brought tears. Mementos can bring us closer to our loved ones and closer to God. Have a blessed day!
Thank you, Melissa. You’ve described the process perfectly. Wishing you joy and blessings!
Katherine, I have boxes of pictures from my parent’s house because my dad was a photographer. I treasure these memories and the legacy they left me and my brothers. They didn’t acquire worldly wealth, but the stuff my mom saved (even though we did have to get rid of some) reflected their lives. I can certainly identify with what you are going through.
Your dad was a photographer! That’s wonderful–what an awesome legacy he left to share with you and your family. I’m so glad you shared your memories with me Barbara. Blessings!
I share many of those same sentiments, Katherine.
Thank you, Diana. Wishing you a blessed week.
I have decluttered and reorganized many things and many times. One of the most peace-giving efforts was to get my estate paperwork in order to make it as easy as possible for my executor. Thanks for sharing your journey, Katherine.
I think you are one of those “don’t put it off” people, Joni. You’re a wonderful example for us. I’m thankful, in most cases, I’m also a non-procrastinator. In this situation, I failed and put off the task way too long. But I think I was more ready at this stage in my life. I’m so thankful God was with me during this process. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.