Looking back, pressing forward
The title of my blog might cause you to wonder if this is a “welcome to the new year” message, but that isn’t the case. For the past month, I’ve been deeply engaged in cleaning out my mother’s house. It’s a process of looking back, pressing forward.
My mother went to be with Jesus in 2000.
What? I imagine eyebrows raised in confusion and the thought, Her mother died twenty-five years ago and she’s just now cleaning out the house?
Yes, it seems impossible that I’ve waited this long.
Actually, I didn’t wait all those years. After my mother’s death, my husband and I purchased her house from the estate. I immediately began to sort through an enormous trove of memorabilia, personal papers, and historical records from generations–my parents, maternal grandparents, and great grandparents, and several cousins of my mother who died without heirs.
About this time, my job situation changed. I’d worked out of town for a year and commuted home on weekends. After receiving a promotion, a sixty hour workweek became the norm. Weekends were crammed with church activities, assisting on the farm, and coping with family needs. Overwhelmed with my responsibilities, work at my mother’s house went to the back burner.
Now, twenty-five years later, I’m committed to finishing the task:
- An infinite number of newspaper clippings, many from two previous centuries.
- Almost an infinite number of pictures, most not labeled.
- Correspondence from numerous family members covering more than 150 years.
- A mountain of magazines and journals.
- Genealogical research focused on numerous families.
- A plethora of documents and memorabilia from multiple lives.
- Books, books, and books . . .
- Sewing, knitting, and craft supplies (many projects in progress).
- Items, gadgets, and things that people who experienced the poverty of depression, the shortages of war, and hard times of economic struggles deem important to save, “I might need that.”
It’s overwhelming!
Looking back
As I sit in the house of my childhood, I feel my Mama’s presence, the mother who:
- Toiled long hours as a school teacher, yet had a hot, nutritious meal for us each night.
- Spent many hours sewing clothes for me because we couldn’t afford store bought.
- Labored in the summer raising a big garden; harvesting, freezing, and canning for the winter.
- Instilled a hard work ethic and the will to excel in each of her five children.
- Disciplined firmly, with love and high expectations.
- Encouraged me in teaching and completing the advanced degrees I needed to become a college professor.
- Instilled in me a love of family, history, and learning.
Long hours of sorting through memories brings me both joy and sorrow.
My mother was valedictorian of her high school class. She excelled in college. With courage beyond her years, she boarded a train for Atlanta to marry my father in 1942 before he shipped off to war. She left college to birth five children, then returned in her thirties to complete a teaching degree.
I mourn for the challenges she experienced, yet I know her battles made her strong.
Press forward
I’m still working at her house. People ask me, “What are you going to do with the house when you finish?”
I don’t know for sure, but I know I need to finish the task of sorting through everything my mother kept. Even after I complete the cleanup, there’s much to be done. A house cannot remain empty for twenty-five years without deteriorating. There’s a new roof installed, but many other needed repairs and maintenance tasks still remain.
Looking back, pressing forward
We’re a product of those who nurtured us on our journey. My mother is my hero, she taught me the vital importance of kindness, patience, perseverance, and humility. On my memory journey, I found a list she’d saved from her second enrollment in college in the 1950s.
Mama’s List
- Today I begin a new life and will not fail.
- I will greet this day with love in my heart.
- I will persist until I succeed.
- I am Nature’ greatest miracle (unlimited potential).
- I will live this day as if it were my last.
- Today I will be master of my emotions.
- I will laugh at the world and myself.
- Today I will multiply my values 100 fold (set goals).
- I will act NOW.
- My faith is in God.
I’m not sure where she got the list–perhaps her own creation or from one of her classes or a required reading. I do know that when I found it, I thought she left it just for me.
What do you think–should we add to the list? Who in your life has had the greatest impact in shaping you on your journey? If they are still living, let them know.
She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children arise and call her blessed. (Proverbs 31:25-28a NIV)
Oh wow. What a beautiful post honoring a beautiful life. Thank you so much for sharing your Mama with us. ❤️🩹
Thank you, Kristy. My quest to look carefully through my Mama’s “treasures” has been a labor of love, providing me with much joy and sadness. I’m so grateful for your kind words.
Even though my brother still lives in my mom and dad’s house, we had to go through all her possessions. I found many similar things that you did that gave me a perspective of her life that I did not know. We can be thankful for the godly legacy our parents leave behind, and pray we can do the same.
I agree, Barbara. I am thankful for my parents, especially my dear Mama, and their loving and godly influence. Like you, I hope to leave a similar legacy of love and kindness to my children and grandchildren. Blessings!
What a beautiful message! Thank you for sharing with us. Have a blessed day!
Thank you, Melissa. Sending good wishes to you as well, and showers of blessings for you and your family.
What a beautiful, thought provoking, and heartwarming post. Reminds me of my personal experiences and read this with a smile and tears. Thank you.
I’ve shed some tears on this particularly journey, too, Marilyn. Thank you for your understanding and encouragement.
What a wonderful, overwhelming, memory-filled task. Thank you for sharing about the life and example of your precious mama, Katherine.
Yes, “wonderful and overwhelming” is the perfect description of this task, Diana. I’m grateful you stopped by and shared kind encouragement. Peace and blessings!
Katherine, this post is awe inspiring and a blessing to read of your amazing mother. Thanks for sharing,
Thank you, Lisa. Our mothers are a special gift and you, my friend, are giving your mother the most loving gift possible. Thank you for being a wonderful, loving daughter, through the toughest of times. May God continue to bless you.
A very nice tribute, Katherine.
Thank you, Tim. Wishing you a great week!
What an amazing woman, your mother! To accomplish all she did when culture didn’t support women and education. What a treasure trove she left you!
Love the list! Still applicable for us today.
Yes, Candyce, my mother is my hero and I’m blessed to have had this opportunity to learn even more about her as I look through her memories. I guess one person’s clutter is another’s treasure. Send good wishes for joy, sunshine, and blessings.
I think the list is perfect. What a treasure. Thanks Katherine.
I agree, Sylvia. My experience this summer has been a treasure as I’ve seen, touched, read, and absorbed so much of her life. Thank you for you kind words. Blessings!
As we prepare to go to my SIL’s house to celebrate my brother’s life, your message really touches me. I just wait through old photos to find ones of him as a child. What a great treasure in the list. I hope you find many more treasures.
I’m so sorry for your loss, Yvonne. I’m sure you will find treasures as you look through photos and memorabilia. I have found so much, too much for me to store, but so many precious memories. May God give you peace and comfort, my friend.
Thank you for sharing your memories. Praying for you as you continue to go through her possessions.
Thank you, Joni, It’s been a labor of love, but a mixture of joy and sorrow. Wishing you a blessed week.
Hi Katherine –
I’m actually going through the same process. I am working my way through my parents home. My sweet Dad passed six years ago, but I just lost my dear Mother in January of this year. My parents lived in their home over 40 years. I have been working my way through so many items that you described so well … saved newspaper clippings, numerous photos and saved greeting cards, etc. I’ve made little progress, but I know I must keep going. It is extremely sad and emotional. Thank you for sharing about your experience.
Oh my, Donna, I’m praying for you. It is so very hard. Lots of tears and happy memories which bring more tears. I’ll be thinking of you and wishing you peace and comfort. May God bless you, my friend.